So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
