i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
