She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
