So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
