I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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