Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
