I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
