My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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