haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
