this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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