? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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