I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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