I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
