Will you blow on my dice?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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