You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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