Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
