I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
