Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
