but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Randomize
