it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
