Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
