at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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