You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
