so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
