just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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