I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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