in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
