That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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