I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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