I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I am puke
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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