Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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