he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
MIDGETS
????
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
