yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
