I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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