Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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