Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
