I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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