look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
