her vagina looked like bernie madoff
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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