ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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