Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
