fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I think people are normalizing furries
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
