I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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