Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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