wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
