his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
NoShamevember. You game?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
