Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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