Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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