I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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