I don't think brook has ever known best
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize